Hello Love!
Tell me this, have you ever felt as though you need to lock yourself away somewhere and just enjoy the silence and peace and solitude? I know I have. Many people feel this way these days because of all the rushing and stress we feel on a daily basis. Most of us have the responsibility of a job, a boss, a family, children, co-workers, bills, obligations, which definitely build our stress level. Add to that the stress we feel from just listening to the news every day! And who the heck are we going to vote for??? Ugh!
The concept of "Cave Time" comes to us from John Gray, author of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. His philosophy states that when a man comes home from work, he needs quiet time to decompress after his long day, and his wife must allow him that time before she begins to share her day with him.
To that I say, "HIS long day? What about MY long day?" Well, let me tell you, I jumped on the idea of cave time 100 years ago, when I first heard about this philosophy. To me - and I'd bet you as well - few things are as relaxing as some time away from all of the noise of our lives. To enter a quiet home or room, put on some music, light a candle or two, close my eyes and let the feeling of peace and calm wash over me.
Do you feel this is something that would be good for you? Well, I am here to tell you that giving yourself this gift occasionally can be life changing. To let everything go for an hour or so - or 3 hours - or 30 minutes, is a beautiful time of freedom.
In Virginia Woolf's book, "A room of one's own" she tells us, "A woman must have her own money and a room of her own in order to be a writer."
Money will be another post, but Virginia's idea of a room of one's own to write is what we must pay attention to. In order to be creative, and comfortable in your own skin, and comfortable with who you truly are as an individual, you must have the time and space to yourself. You must have time to think without interruption. Without criticism. Without judgement. You must have time to examine who you are, how you feel and what you truly want. Most women try to make these choices and figure things out with the noise of their lives swirling around their heads. With that noise and distraction, she'll come to half of a conclusion. But in the quiet time, the alone time, all the answers become clear.
So give yourself this beautiful gift. Find a place that is quiet and make it your own. Ask your family to allow you a bit of quiet time here and there to relax. If you get push back from them, and you just might, then find a quiet place to go. A bookstore, a cafe, a park, a quiet coffee shop. Take yourself there and relax. Go into your "cave" and let that time be all about YOU. If it feels uncomfortable, as though you have too much to do, then you need cave time even more! Start small. Take 15 minutes. Then increase the time as you become more and more comfortable with yourself.
So, my beautiful friend, from this day forward, you have permission to give yourself some "Cave Time." I promise you that you'll get more from this time to yourself than you can possibly imagine. It is SO worth it!
Please leave a comment and let me know what you think about this subject and if you would like me to address any specific subject that concerns you!
Love,
Donna
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