....In my last post, I said I would share with you what my life looked like before I decided that I'd had enough of the disorganization. I was self-employed, which I am no longer. Sidenote: I REALLY miss working for myself. It's not for everyone. It's 24/7. Well at least it was for me. When - not if - WHEN I am able to become self-employed again, I know I will be so much more successful than I was last time. Why? The Big "O"!!! Organization.
I needed to be organized, but I didn't know it yet. I was just scrambling through each day, trying to stay in touch with my existing clients, manage my product, find new clients, manage my household, get my dog to the million Vet appointments she seemed to need, work out, maintain my nails, keep the fridge stocked with Champagne - thank you Cara Alwill-Leyba for showing me that Champagne is a big priority in my life! ...keep food in the house, cook meals to keep my husband from starving, pick up the dry cleaning, vacuum up the dog hair... AAAAAAaaaaaahhhhhh!!!
You got it. I was all over the place! And this went on for AGES!!! I remember back then that there were days when I would go non-stop, 100 miles per hour, grab a burger at a drive-thru, go home, clean the house, make dinner, lay in bed and not remember a thing that I did. I would actually lay there trying to remember what I'd accomplished on a given day and feel really badly when I realized that while I was moving as fast as I could, I accomplished absolutely nothing. I'd look at my to do list and see that I didn't cross off a single thing. This happened to me over and over. I was busy being busy. Sound familiar?
At one point, I was laying in bed thinking about my day, for the 10th or so day in a row and realized that I hadn't even looked at my list for days and days. I had run errands, some for me, mostly for other people, and didn't do one single thing that would push me towards success in my business. And worse than that, I didn't even feel good about what I had done and the tasks I had completed. No sense of accomplishment whatsoever!
That was the night I cried. I was physically and mentally exhausted and I had nothing to show for it. Now, believe me, I'm not the type to feel sorry for myself, and that's not where I'm going with this. I was PISSED. So pissed that all I could do was cry. Really?? Exhaustion with NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT??? I'm sorry, but that does not work for me.
I needed to get a grip. If I'm going to work my ass off, at least I want to be happy doing it, and see some results from it. Exhaustion is just not enough for me. So how did I handle this, you ask? I had a four day weekend-long pity party for myself. I earned it. I cried, prayed, listened to gentle music, listened to Ozzy Osbourne. Even my pity party was all over the place, but I felt good about this weekend.
For the first time in ages, I felt like I was attempting to take control of my life, my attitude, my tasks and obligations. There was a light that started shining on me (not really, but I felt like there should be). I felt GOOD. I felt like I had taken a minute to get in control. During the last few hours of my weekend-long pity party I started organizing my brain a little. Then I started writing some things down.
And I realized there was something absolutely HUGE that I needed to do, and I had to do it RIGHT AWAY.....
